So during the Full Moon in Aries ritual, something that came up was Self-Care and it really got me thinking. This isn't something that I typically have a routine for or consider doing very often so this was a timely reminder to look after myself.
Ever since I moved into my home, I've struggled to keep on top of my own housework - whether it be washing up, laundry, taking out the trash or dusting. Part of my struggle with housework stems from housework chores as a child (now I'm not saying I shouldn't have had to do them but I went from enjoying them to disliking them immensely), mental health issues and the fact that I've never had a home that's just mine to be house-proud of.
I've struggled most of my life with mental health issues. My mental health issues include social anxiety - particularly when I'm in new places because I have to know where the entrances/exits are, but also from always feeling like I had to hide how I really felt about anything and everything with anyone and everyone. I also have recessive depression, which means that when I have a depressive episode, it's more likely to manifest internally rather than in a more "obvious" external way.
I either binge-eat or I completely go off food for several days during an episode. But it's not just my eating habits that have been affected. It affects my ability to be social. It affects my ability to do my housework and keep on top of it. It affects my sleeping where I struggle to get to sleep and I don't have a sleep routine because I'm either too awake or too tired to sleep. (I've tried a variety of fixes but nothing has helped me long-term and I can't go on long-term medication.) I used to struggle to get out of bed some days because of my depression.
However, that trend started to change in December 2023. I got all my washing up done (a month's worth and you don't want to know the state of my kitchen), tidied every room and set my personal intention for this year (from Yule basically) that I would keep this up.
The only thing I hadn't done was clean my kitchen and bathroom floors, but I can finally say that I've done them. They do need a second clean but not Cinderella-style scrubbing on hands and knees.
I hope to add this to my more manageable housework to-do list so that as and when I have anyone round, I feel proud to have people in my home.
Since Yule 2021, a lot of how I was has changed. My home is clean and tidy and for the most part (apart from a couple of little jobs) has been this way for almost a whole year. I'm eating better and being more mindful of my own body - by this I mean that I'm not forcing myself to eat because I know I need food. I'm not cooking if I'm not hungry but at the same time, I'm eating as healthily as possible when I do cook. I've gotten organised within my home and that has reflected outwardly (I think).
The week before Yule used to be a difficult time for me because my mum passed at that time of year. In previous years, December usually saw at least one depressive episode if not more. But 2021 was different because I found a particular song that seems to have brought me to the other side of the sadness of my grief. Music seems to have a way of speaking to my moods which is always a good thing. So this part of my self-care has improved and I've been more able to take care of my home which has improved my own mental health.
I have found a tea that helps with my sleep, which I have written about in a separate post (check out "Witch's Brews"). This is a minor miracle as I have tried a lot of things, including medication from a medical professional, and nothing else has worked. I'm glad that a friend gifted it to me this year and I tried it. It was very much needed by me and I love how it tastes and looks.
But from the Full Moon in Aries ritual, which was a very powerful ritual, I wanted to focus some more on my Self-Care and the ways in which I show my own Self some much-needed Love. I felt called to pull some cards from a couple of decks I have that focus on Self-Care and then Self-Love.
I got three cards from my Self-Care deck that jumped out together and they are all rather self-explanatory. I do need to be more protective of my energy and mental space. I grew up having to please others and this is a habit I'm trying to break, which was the second card. I do need to do more for myself, to make myself happy before I can even consider trying to bring happiness to others. My third card is something that I'm working on but having had just a single shelf-sized space in the top of an under-counter fridge for the last year has meant that space was limited and I had to prioritise whether to freeze meat, meals or have frozen vegetables. Since this ritual, I have acquired a fridge-freezer and semi-filled it with meat, meals and vegetables. Some may wonder why I don't use fresh foods but the problem is that I don't always use them in my food so I'd rather not have food go to waste when I could buy frozen and everything works for me.
My Self-Love card is empowering in the sense that whenever I have felt stuck, I also felt like I didn't have any power or way to move forward with my life. But this card is saying that I always have the power and that I'm never truly stuck as things can always improve. I also feel like this card was reiterating something that has been coming to me a lot this year - the idea that my inner world influences my outer world so if there's an obstacle in my outer world, then there's one in my inner world. I have a tendency to say this to others without following my own advice. I think it's about time that I actually practiced what I preach, so this was a much-needed message that I think it was timely to receive when I did. I hold the power within me to get myself through whatever it is I'm facing.
I do think that in the future, it would be a good idea to see what self-care practices I can use on a weekly basis. And because of this, I will be pulling a card or two from my Self-Care deck each week to see what I could try to find some practices that work for me.
If you feel like you've been neglecting your own self-care practices, feel free to explore some of the things I'm going to be doing but have a look at what it is that fits you. Self-care is like Witchcraft as it's not "one-size fits all" and it should be tailored to each of us individually.
Peace and much love to all!!!
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